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No More Mean Girls: The Secret to Raising Strong, Confident, and Compassionate Girls
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In this Queen Bees and Wannabes for the elementary and middle school set, child and adolescent psychotherapist Katie Hurley shows parents of young girls how to nip mean girl behavior in the bud.
Once upon a time, mean girls primarily existed in high school, while elementary school-aged girls spent hours at play and enjoyed friendships without much drama. But in this fast-paced world in which young girls are exposed to negative behaviors on TV and social media from the moment they enter school, they are also becoming caught up in social hierarchies much earlier. No More Mean Girls is a guide for parents to help their young daughters navigate tricky territories such as friendship building, creating an authentic self, standing up for themselves and others, and expressing themselves in a healthy way.
The need to be liked by others certainly isn't new, but this generation of girls is growing up in an age when the "like" button shows the world just how well-liked they are. When girls acknowledge that they possess positive traits that make them interesting, strong, and likeable, however, the focus shifts and their self-confidence soars; "likes" lose their importance. This book offers actionable steps to help parents empower young girls to be kind, confident leaders who work together and build each other up.
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Audible Audiobook
Listening Length: 8 hours and 15 minutes
Program Type: Audiobook
Version: Unabridged
Publisher: Penguin Audio
Audible.com Release Date: January 30, 2018
Language: English, English
ASIN: B078KDY2QG
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
I really wanted to like this book. I have a daughter and want her to be a good friend. To be independent. To be thoughtful, have integrity, and be genuine.To preface, my family moved a fair amount before I was 10. I attended 3 different schools and as such, had trouble making lasting friends until later in life. I was made fun of a great deal, and no matter what I did or said, I was not popular. My parents tried to help me navigate this, and when their suggestions did not work (or backfired), I felt even more like a "loser." Reflecting as an adult, I wish I'd spent a great deal LESS time focusing on trying to get those girls to like me, and a lot more time on things I cared about. The first half of this book preaches the opposite.Tips on how your daughter can be more likable. Tips on what she can say to get other girls to be friends with her. How to get invited to the cool girls' party. How to avoid social faux pas such as using sarcasm that is misunderstood by others, or playing with one girl at another's expense.The second half of the book talks about how to build up girls' self-confidence, authenticity, and growth mindset. This is far more worthwhile. I wish it were the focus of the whole book. IMO, this is the stuff that matters. Not whether you're likable. In fact, the "authenticity" chapter contradicts an earlier section in which the author suggests that the reader have their daughter practice phrases to help them make friends. There are some excellent reflective activities for girls and their parents throughout these chapters.The problem is, I was expecting a book that would enable me to help my daughter learn to be confident, authentic, and just "herself" regardless of what other girls are doing or saying. To fly above the "mean girls," so to speak. Instead, the book solves the mean girl issue with a hearty dose of teaching our daughters to behave a specific way in order to fit in and avoid being left out or uncool.If you want to learn about raising a confident child, there are some good tips in the 2nd half (and again, decent activities), but personally I recommend reading a book about growth mindset, grit, or similar instead.
I couldn't wait to get my hands on this book! As a parent and a therapist, I run across "mean girl" behaviors all the time, and can sometimes feel at such a loss to help girls manage and navigate their way through these situations. "No More Mean Girls" gave me such a clear way of looking at and understanding these behaviors. Most importantly, it gave me some really good and concrete ways to handle this, both as an adult, and ways which I could help the girls in my life. As a parent and as a girl, I understand that emotions can run high when faced with this, so it's helpful to have some clearly thought out ways available to try out and use. I so loved this book, and now consider it to be one of my go-to reads on this subject, and the subject of helping our girls grow up to become strong and respectful of themselves and others.
Author Katie Hurley knows first hand about the challenges girls face in all development stages. She is an activist for empowering girls and helping them to find confidence in themselves. She provides easy to use tools/strategies to help girls focus on what really is important, and to build them up, and not be victims of "Mean Girls". This book is needed now more than ever, as we all see the negative impacts of social media and how girls self esteem is affected at much younger ages. This guide will help inform you, will open your eyes to issues you may not have know existed, and provide ways to help you navigate what you can do. A must read!
I read a lot of parenting books and I have to say this is one of my favorites. Katie does an excellent job of describing the culture that we live in and how its affecting our children, specially girls. I have a daughter who is in 2nd grade and been dealing with mean girls since kindergarten. This is a topic we all need to be talking about and help our kids empathize with others as kindness is the only way we can thrive. Thank you Katie for writing this book it has already changed the way I think about empowering my children to more kind and caring.
I love this book because it not only prepares you for what to look for and how to handle it, but it gives helpful suggestions for activities you can do with your daughter to help build her self esteem. I couldn’t have asked for more!
I’m still in the process of reading this book. From what I’m read it seems very good. I’ve alreadu learned some things I didn’t know when it comes to helping my daughter deal with her bullies. I do wish their were more activities to do with child. I read that there were some in book and I still haven’t come across them. Definitely worth a try if you are dealing with bullies and girls!
This book is so pertinent to what is happening with young people today. It is a problem solver! It is written by an author with professional knowledge of her subject, as well as personal knowledge of young people in her life. A must read for every parent and teacher!
If you have daughters or work with girls, this book is spot on and is a must read. I have learned a great deal about how girls socialize, and how this can contribute to the mean girl phenomenon. Great book!
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